Lessons from My
Father, Part One
If I were a holiday, I’d hate to be a June holiday. There’s just no recognition. Let me be Christmas or even President’s Day
before being a June holiday, because when it comes to June, holidays for some
reason are forgotten. Does anyone even
know what day “Flag Day” is? Hmm, does anyone even
know that Flag Day is a June holiday?
The other big June holiday, of course, is Father’s Day. I don’t know why it is that Mother’s Day is
so big, and Father’s Day is an afterthought.
I think some serious gender discrimination is occurring, for who can say
that one parent is more important than the other? God has so designed families that we really
need both parents, and when we don’t have them, we encounter special troubles,
not insurmountable troubles, but special troubles nonetheless.
My father entered the presence of the Lord two years
ago. I continue to draw inspiration from
his life. Six months ago, I became a grandfather, and I've found
myself thinking about my father's influence on his grandchilden. So, as a way
to honor his influence in my life and to pass some of what he taught me along
to you, I'm going to share 20 lessons that I learned from my father. We'll have 10 this week, and 10 next week.
1. Keep
the Gospel at the heart of all you do.
Dad saw that the only reason he had any wisdom at all was that God
opened his eyes to the Gospel. He never
forgot the grace of God. Everything else
was an outflow of the impact of the Gospel upon his life. Although Dad was a man of principle, those
principles were not ends in themselves.
They derived from grace through faith in the death, burial, and
resurrection of Jesus Christ. Because
Jesus Christ took Dad’s punishment, there was freedom to live for God, to serve
Jesus Christ’s church, and to be led by the Holy Spirit.
2. The
Bible is the clear communication of God to us, and I should read it for a feast
for the soul. My Dad read, taught, and
lived the Bible. The discussion of the
Bible was part of our natural discourse and conversation. We simply could not have a conversation in
our home without some reference to scripture.
3. Love
your wife. My Dad’s earthly affections
were always and only for my mother. He
often told us that all he ever wanted was a wife and family that loved the
Lord. And he never got over the fact
that the Lord indeed gave him those treasures.
He never got over that Mom said, “Yes.”
4. Pray
for the individual members of your family by name every day. My Dad did this for each of his children,
their spouses, his grandchildren, and their spouses. He went to bed in prayer for his family. His prayers were no mere formal, “God bless”
prayers either. He prayed specifically
for our spiritual encouragement, most especially that we would stay true to
Christ and the Gospel. As a child, I
remember not just that Dad would pray for
me, but he would pray nightly with me. What a powerful way to introduce the wonder
of the Divine!
5. Spend
time with your children; have fun with them; worship with them; instruct
them. My Dad spelled the word “father”—T
I M E. He gave us his time. He played with us, read to us, told us
stories. He made a priority of worship
attendance. He taught us from daily life
how to think Christianly. His
instruction was more from real encounters with God and the world than it was a
systematic teaching. And while there is
a place for systematic teaching, the teaching that happens “when you sit in
your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down and when you
rise” (Deuteronomy 6:7) indelibly connects life to the scriptures.
6. Laugh
at yourself--a lot. It makes you more
approachable and fun to be with. My Dad
might not have enjoyed being the brunt of the joke, but you could never tell it
by being with him. He enjoyed retelling
his blunders in life, and he equally enjoyed it when others retold them. There is a strong humility in this that made
my father attractive and approachable.
7. It
is worthwhile to love people who are not very lovable and to do so for many
years without getting much in return or response. My Dad loved and cared for a stepmother in
her old age who, many years earlier, had been an active participant in the
breakup of his parents. Seeing such
grace in action was a powerful testimony that the Gospel is real.
8. Be
compassionate to those to whom life has dealt tough blows. My Dad always seemed to be helping and
counseling men who had made wrong choices or who had been dealt great
misfortune. His compassion was practical
but not naïve. It was measured with good
boundaries, but it was a real extension of the grace of God.
9. Always
stay in the arena of discipleship. Keep
mentoring and discipling people. Keep
teaching the Word of God. Right until
the last weeks of his life, my father was meeting with men, young and old, and
encouraging their walk with Christ. He
never retired from the service of the King.
10. Give away as
much as you can. My Dad had a long list
of Christian ministries that he supported over and above his regular giving to
his church. If Jesus’ words are true,
that a man’s heart is where his treasure is, then my father had his heart in a
lot of places but always with one goal—the advancement of the Gospel and the
kingdom of Jesus Christ.
Awesome Scott! I had the privilege of attending your father's Sunday School class for a good many years. Regarding #5, Spending TIME with your children, I remember an incident that your Dad once related to our class. A neighbor had once complained to him that his yard looked unkept and the grass needed mowing. He said he simply responded, "well, I'm raising children, not grass." I loved it, and your Dad. -Bill T.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comment, Bill. I love that story about the lawn!
ReplyDelete